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Top 4 Worst Superhero Movies of All Time

Caitlin LaCour

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Superhero movies have become wildly popular in the last decade. Practically everyone has seen one of the many that come out each year- from the gritty Dark Knight series to the campy X-men franchise. However, these are the worst of the genre.

4. Guardians of the Galaxy

The most laughable scene in the movie. It was supposed to be a serious moment. It’s a hospital bed in space.

When I heard all the heaps of praise this movie received and still gets, I am honestly astonished. This movie, released in 2014 by Marvel, starred Chris Pratt as cookie-cutter character number 1 in this paint-by-numbers, cliched mess. It’s a shame too, considering how sci-fi is my favorite genre, I expected to love this movie. But what this movie is is a cluster of uninspired, unmemorable characters and a plotline so convoluted and overly complicated that it’s laughable. The humor is equivalent to a middle school boy just discovering comic books. The characters are weak, with little to no development- you can describe most of them in one word. Starlord- sarcastic. Rocket Raccoon- hothead. Groot- ??? Gamorrah- bland. Drax- dumb. They are each a walking cliche- Pratt’s character is basically a punchline dispenser, shooting off one-liners that are supposed to pass as witty. Gamorrah, aka the green-skinned tight suit wearing love interest, is probably the most unmemorable of them all. I can barely remember a word that she said in the whole movie. The Raccoon was ok, and worked just because it was such a bizarre character, and the tree (Groot) was for some reason a fan favorite despite only speaking three words (truly Vin Diesel’s best performance). Drax I remember having some actually sort of funny lines, but he had basically one gimick and that got old pretty quickly. I guess all the characters are supposed to be a team and work well together, but there is practically no chemistry between any of them. That’s probably because half of the time the actors were staring and talking to props on a green screen instead of other actors.  I put this one high on the list, because despite being overrated, forgettable, and just plain stupid, it had a nice soundtrack and the visuals were not terrible.

 

3. Fant4stic

Gaze upon our expressionless heroes.

I have a soft spot for the Fantastic 4, mostly because it was the franchise I watched the most as a kid. I loved the characters of Mr Fantastic, the Invisible Woman,  the Human Torch, and the Thing. But this movie completely ripped apart the charm of the campy team and replaced the heroes with emotionless cardboard cutouts. I wouldn’t even call them characters in this movie- they act more like robots, with no heart behind their performances and the personality of an old shoe. The movie is a re-imagining of the origins of the Fantastic Four, and is about a group of young adults who get powers in a freak accident and form a team to stop an evil threat from destroying the world…so, typical plot. This is another of those movies that think applying a grey filter over every scene makes it a gritty drama. No, it just emphasizes how dull and washed-out everything in this movie is. They gutted out the personalities of the Fantastic Four, which was one of the main draws of the series to begin with. They have no chemistry, no motivation, nothing. This movie barely has a plot. It’s like you’re waiting the entire time for something to happen and it never does. There is one good scene in this movie, and it’s the scene where the team gets their powers, which is an excellent scene and deserves recognition. It’s the only part of the movie with any emotion from the characters at all. And then, right after that great scene, the movie commits it’s biggest offender- a time jump. You don’t get to watch as the Fantastic Four develop their powers and grow as people- no, it skips ahead a several months and you don’t get filled in on anything that happens between. Horrible decision to do that.

 

2. Suicide Squad

Jared Leto’s performance as the Joker is both the best and worst part of this movie.

The movie that spawned a new generation of edgelords. Thanks, DC. Suicide Squad is about a bunch of famous and not-so-famous villains that are forced by way of bomb collars to fight a evil ghost woman from resurrecting an army to destroy the world. I guess what the movie was going for was a comedic drama about a group of misfits getting to know each other. With a cast of characters ranging from villains you have heard of (the Joker, Harley Quinn) to those you never knew existed (Captain Boomerang, Deadshot) to those you wish you never knew about (Killer Croc, Diablo), there could have been some serious comedic value to just how bizarre they are and how they fit together and interact. But you don’t get any character development past a few rushed flashback scenes from Harley Quinn, Deadshot, and Diablo. The other characters are introduced with a few lines of backstory and that’s it. None of the characters are interesting or intriguing or even comedic- they’re just forgettable. And once again, every single scene looks like it had a grey filter applied over it. The movie looks like it was shot on a camcorder being held by the shaking hand of a soccer mom and edited by a six year old on Windows Movie Maker.  The special effects range from average to downright terrible, especially near the end with the giant ghost portal, which the actors stare so blankly at it could not be more obviously green screen. It’s not even convincing CGI- it’s overused to the point of hillarity. And that’s what this movie is – hilariously bad. The reason it’s not number one is because it made me laugh with how absurdly terrible it was, and didn’t seem to take itself too seriously.

 

1.Man of Steel

Man of Product Placement

This is the movie that made me hate superhero movies for a long time. Man of Steel, directed by Zack Snyder, is the prime example of everything wrong with the genre. It’s dull, it’s bland, it’s loud explosions and huge buildings crashing down and gunfire and lasers in a cacophony of cliche. This movie is just depressing- the entire movie looks like they just applied a gray filter over the camera. The characters in this movie rarely smile, instead they have a perpetually confused or bored look on their faces, as if even they don’t know what they’re doing in this movie. I suppose it was trying to be gritty, like the Dark Knight, but it failed miserably in that sense- this is Superman, not Batman. Superman is not supposed to be some serious, brooding character. He is a ridiculous, over the top, hero with a heart of gold, not an expressionless, angst-filled, personalityless edgelord. Nothing about this movie is any fun at all- I’m not saying every movie needs to make you laugh and feel good, but this is Superman, a character beloved by millions, and they utterly destroyed everything that made him so memorable. This movie is basically about one hour of watching Henry Cavill brood and mope around, and one hour of watching the entire city get utterly destroyed by General Zod and Superman himself as they have a long, drawn-out battle. Also, the advertising in this movie is so bad it’s laughable- at one point, Superman gets thrown into an iHop, and it just keeps the logo in screen. I guess after watching such a dull, depressing movie, you’ll want to eat some pancakes with whip-cream smiley faces afterwards to feel better. If you value human emotion, do NOT see this movie.

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Top 4 Worst Superhero Movies of All Time